anything and everything about me

Thinking much here~

2012-01-18T01:33:00.002+08:00

Haha...Having this weird habit of thinking of things that curious me, things that are non-existence but they bother me much, things that may not happen in reality (This case Is MAY NOT, doesn't mean that it don't happen), things that caught my attention and things around me that make me think of them when alone.

The world has been changing and never stops to wait for anyone. Everyone got to move on with their lives and the 3Fs usually apply: Forget, Forgive, Forgo. But things have been moving too fast to be catch up with. The world. The technology. The time. The people. People are changing without knowing themselves that they are changing and they neither would admit that they have changed. These kind of people are usually masked with another mask on them to prevent getting more hurt and harm from the people around them. Some toyed with others' feelings and relationships, thinking that it was fun. Some had strong desire to control others' life and destroy trust between.

Cant sleep here. Thinking much around.

Alien Language~

2012-01-17T20:53:00.002+08:00

I have lots to complain about the school.

Started school already..And I am listening alien stuffs...Everything is like so WAH!!!SO CHEM~!!!

Year 1 Sem 2 only lehhs...Especially Linear Algebra 2. Started to sleep in lectures more often than in JC...GosH~

And some lectures and tutors are neither ang moh or singaporeans... Having that stupid accent was so annoying and irritating...ARGH....

So miss JC and Secondary school maths which was so damn freaking easier.... :(

school has started~

2012-01-12T14:51:00.002+08:00

Gosh...My timetable is horrible. Is like almost everyday except Monday, lessons start at 8.30am.

Sianz~

My last week of rotting~

2012-01-04T20:11:00.002+08:00

Yea..this is the last week to rot and enjoy my life at home doing nothing and worrying nothing except the time to wake up...haha..

Hope the weather on Saturday is just like today's sunny weather.

2012~

2012-01-01T22:22:00.001+08:00

Finally..Is a new Year....

Has been days since I last blog...hahaz...

Almost totally forgot about this blog alr...

This year, I will try to continue to love you...my blog~

Rotting~

2011-12-13T18:35:00.001+08:00

Gosh. I'm really rotting at home during this wonderful holidays. Haiz.

Want to go out, but one you're out, money will be out also.

No money to spend.....Haiz....

Change to a more merry song for xmas.... :)

Holidays for me!!~

2011-12-05T22:07:00.002+08:00

Haha...Finally the long-waiting holiday has arrived. Got to do many things; to go shopping, to watch many many nice movies, to go out and eat nice food and play around, not forgetting to exercise or will grow horizontally....

First day of my holiday, was a Friday was a horrendous day for me. Though morning I went back to the center to have fun with my 宝贝们, afternoon totally destroyed my day...

Second day of my holiday went to a Fire Station with my CCA kids. Was stoning there while the kids were having fun playing and looking around at the fire engines and playing with the water hoses. After that, me ama and st went to town to catch a movie, Breaking Dawn Part 1. The movie was so wad-the-hell. As in the end was so dumb and lame though supposedly to stop hanging in the air for the part 2 to continue. Then we walked from cine to Ion Orchard shopping and looking around. After that, we went to the library. Hahaz. And also, I finally got to change my phone to the one I totally wanted and wished for, though I've to have for the phone myself.

Third day: Sunday. Got a small injury to my toe due to a falling object from my cupboard and hit hard onto my toe. Has been bleeding till today... :(

Today nothing much. Rotting at home.

And found that my blog is totally DEAD....

RIP~

解脱~

2011-12-01T21:59:00.001+08:00

Yea...Finally Exam is over...Is happy and yet so sad...

so gonna score very badly for all the papers... :(

Dec....here I come...

I've got alot of things to do during the holidays...

Hwaiting~

Is so not like me~

2011-11-26T00:19:00.001+08:00

I'm so freaking busy with studying for my first finals....Is more chiong than when in JC...

Haiz. So hoping that exam can finish fast fast and my holiday can also come fast fast~.....

Stressing up~

2011-11-18T22:14:00.002+08:00

Finals are coming...gosh...so stressed up with all the studying and the discussions in media in China.

Summore, I fell sick again~....

Gosh~

11-11-11

2011-11-11T00:50:00.002+08:00

11-11-11 known to be an auspicious day. The date sounds rather cool.

Make a wish and it will come true? Maybe.

What should I wish for? My Mr Right? My family? My friends? My upcoming Finals? My grades?

Too Many to choose from already and everything is so important to me.

The time 11.11 means that someone misses you. True?

I always see digits that are the same, something bad is going to happen?

Nites to All! :)

Though my blog totally seems dead...

改变~

2011-11-05T23:28:00.002+08:00

人常常在不知不觉地情况下，慢慢地改变。可以从喜欢热闹到喜欢清静，从不喜欢的变成喜欢的，喜欢的变成不喜欢的，从陌生人变成朋友，也能从朋友变成陌生人。

改变，会是好的吗？

匪夷所思~

2011-11-04T23:06:00.003+08:00

今天又下雨了。

我既喜欢雨天，也很讨厌雨天。好想在雨天的时候，坐在cafe里面吃着不会融化的冰淇凌，或是喝着永远不会凉掉的cappuccino或latte，望着人来人往拿着雨伞行走。又或者是躺在温暖舒服的床上或是豆包(bean cushion)听音乐。喜欢听雨嘀嗒的声音，看雨滴一滴滴地滴在地上。喜欢看着水滴在玻璃窗上慢慢留下来。就有如它滴进我的心房，暂时洗走我的烦恼与不悦。

讨厌雨天因为需要拿着雨伞，鞋子和书包都回因此而湿透。

听说会下雨，是因为天再为某人哭泣。那，它什么时候会为我哭泣呢？

Choices~

2011-10-29T01:05:00.001+08:00

I seriously hate making choices.

Hate doing multiple choices questions and answering to questions that require making a choice.

Strong~

2011-10-27T23:11:00.000+08:00

Is this really true?

busy life; busy me~

2011-10-27T22:56:00.003+08:00

Life is getting more and more busy. The time I sleep is getting later and later. It seems at though there is not enough time for me to complete everything that I desire and want to finish. Finals are coming-- this means more stress are coming and more revision to be done and also no time for other things.

Gosh~...I still want to go out and enjoy my life. December will also be very busy for me, though is end of exams and also is holiday. Got life skill outing for the center kids to fire station, got kids camp also, also got chalet, got to plan class outing as well, wants to go overseas.....and many more....Haix~

Received a sms that totally struck me. Am I really always thinking for others and neglected my own thoughts and feeling? Has this become a habit of mine? Maybe. When has it started? After secondary school?... Just like the saying " Once bitter, twice shy.", maybe that's when I started avoiding making decisions for myself. The fear of making wrong choices,choices that others don't like, and being snared by others always lie within me.

只要他人高兴，我再辛苦，再痛苦，也无所谓~

My room~

2011-10-26T20:49:00.003+08:00

Yeepie....Finally I've a room of mine...is simple but nice. And most Importantly, there's no Pink stuffs in my room...the room concept is going into white and pale purple....yeah.....But the room comes with a price-- that is to earn my own allowance and money....Haiz...Havin hard time dealing with this student i'm currently teaching. He is totally a lazy bum...Didn't do the homework I assigned him to do...And he thinks that he can cope with the sec 3 maths with his standard now( can't even solve Pri 1 maths)...BullShit...

Money is not that easy to earn...Haiz. November is coming. Finals are also coming. Gosh. Had this feeling that school just started not long ago only sia and now, finals are coming. Haiz.

Tmr will be the last session for my CCA tmr...gonna to miss my kid...he's totally cute and clever, unlike the student whom I'm tutoring now.....Haiz.

So suay this week, wanted to go out this week. End up coping at home again....2plans of going out was last minutes cancelled. Haiz. I just want to go out walk walk and play till late night. Haiz..........

I'm currently in love with this show called Vampire Prosecutor. Damn nice sia.

Torture week is over for now~

2011-10-21T23:49:00.003+08:00

Phew, I managed to survive this week--this torturous week. But more are coming. Is like less than 1 month to final year exam...Haix...And I just found that there's a guy quite shuai in one of my tutorial class....wahahaz.

Just finish bringing some stuffs into my new room, mainly books and my notes. Haha, sound like a true mugger in my room...Hahaz...Apparently, i brought my laptop in as well, but it seems that the wireless internet connection is quite slow cos is quite far from the main broadband. Haiz.

Cant wait for the December. Cos is holiday month. Most likely to be free the whole month, except saturdays...So, anyone can chio me out the whole dec......

Eyes cant open anymore. Nites everyone~

Panda~

2011-10-20T23:13:00.002+08:00

Have you seen a human panda?...I got. Everyday I look into the mirror, I see a 'human panda'...

Gosh..not enough sleep this week...Seriously, is driving me crazy. Coffee-habit has came back to me....NO~~~~!!!It took more long to stop but it eventually still come back to me.

Maybe I'm still not used to my new temporarily bedroom and the new bed.

======

I so seriously had this being cheated feeling. Cheated by the JCs teachers who said that uni life will be much better than JCs. Obviously not, ok?...Tests are all streaming in together like queuing up for you to take. Time is flowing faster than in JCs ( that's what I felt)...And that each year with 2 semesters meaning 2 final year exam to stress about....Gosh~~~~~

CHeated and tired~~~

======

I'm so pissed yesterday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Long Time~

2011-10-16T22:40:00.002+08:00

Long Time no blog already.

Has been a week already, this week will be worse of all.

Got 3 tests this weeks..dying soon. Summore I'm giving tuition classes now.

No time plus no time.

Haiz~

SO tired...

Finally I ad a room of mine~.. TEMPORARILY ...the one who rent out room previously left and temp cant find anyone. So, I can use the room~

My blog seems dead~~~~~

haha~

宿命~

2011-10-07T22:31:00.002+08:00

“欲知前生事，今生所受事，前世之因，后世之果”

“欲知前世因，今生所受事，欲知后世果，今生所做事。该还的债，无论经过了多少轮回，始终还是要还的。这就是宿命。

Taken from a book I recently read. It was some phrases that I really like from the book. I'm gonna jot down all the nice phrases and nice sentences that I like. But these phrases above really is something I truly believe.

Ending this stressful week~

2011-10-07T00:52:00.004+08:00

Ever since the recess week is over, life has been getting very stressful. Counting down to the final exam this November...Gosh is like less than 45 days~?? And I had barely survived for the half of sem 1 of year 1. Gosh~~~~~

Everyday is so busy. Hardly had the time to blog...

Today went out for late dinner with my lovely girls~...Yeah...We had fun today~

~agreeing~

2011-09-30T21:36:00.002+08:00

I totally agree this pic. This pic is really wonderful, especially the words.

期待,努力...算什么?

2011-09-28T23:06:00.002+08:00

那一个才是真正的我？我已经不知道了。

活在别人的期待下，活在别人的笑容，活在别人的需要下，我已经不知道真正的我喜欢什么，我要什么。也不知道什么开始我变成了这样，不知道什么时候我发现自己变得不像自己。

伤口可以愈合，但伤疤永远都不会消失。

我的努力不知道多少的人懂，不知道多少人明白。为什么我就是不可以期望其他人能够付出与我相同的努力？就算付出了全部的我，为什么一样还是被忽略，一样被遗忘，一样被他人批评？

I hate planning events, events like birthday surprises,class outings, clique outings etc...Everytime asking people to reply was a torture process. Planning was worse. Asking for suggestions were the worst of all. I always got the fear of people disliking the activities I planned or think of and will complain behind my back. Because something similar happened to me before and it had caused great fear in me.

I remembered myself laughing like mad when on the way home from barrage on saturday with Zhiting at the front. I had no idea at that time whether I was laughing or laughing to cover my tears. I really feel like crying at that time for some reason I also don't know.

One Major Outing~

2011-09-26T22:17:00.002+08:00

Yeah, finally got our 'major clique' outing though some still cant make it for the picnic. Was at barrage this time. Weather was exceptionally good, no rain. Kites can fly and we have no worries on the weather and the wet weather program. But the birthday surprise was considered a failure cos the candles and firestick cant light successfully. Was tiring but fun. Was extremely warm but was nice also... :)

Programming~~~~~~~~~

2011-09-20T20:44:00.003+08:00

Die already for tomorrow's programming graded lab session. Heard that it is hard...and summore without any instructions. OMG~....I 've already have headache in doing programming and yet I've to take the stupid graded session tomorrow. Gonna die.~ Stress-ing over tmr graded lab...

School is tough. Even tutorials are bad...i mean the worksheets. Last time is duno how to do half of the question, now, is half of the worksheets. Next will be the whole tutorial...OMG~~~

-----

any random post here...

所见的未必是事实，所听的也未必是所希望的...

人与人之间，为什么要存在着谎言，欺骗与背叛？

bad day~

2011-09-19T23:20:00.002+08:00

Cos I'd had a bad day....Really bad day!!!

Morning I cant find my braces de rubber bands. Next took a super long time to put those small bands on. Next I left house late today. Then I missed two buses at the same time, in the end, ended up walking to CCK MRT. Next I missed another train.

Then morning got test on Calculus. Totally knocked down by the test. The first time I'll be failing a MATHS Test. OMGGG!!!!.....Then, my phone case spoilt.

Then, when returning home after school, I gt 'squashed' by the MRT door and missed the train. Xiaoqi managed to squeeze into the train while I gt to wait for another one...The door is not any joke.Is so scary~

Bad day today.

Duno wad to name the title~

2011-09-15T23:18:00.001+08:00

Haiz~ Another week had gone. Week 7 is coming. After that, it will be one week of recess week where it's HOLIDAY!!~~~

领悟中~

2011-09-14T00:23:00.002+08:00

开始在想很多事情，也领悟到了很多的事物。

其中就是：＂美丽的东西只属于摆设和在远处欣赏而已，但它永远都不属于自己的＂

That's what I've been telling myself almost daily in the mirror. Things that are nice and beautiful are often for display or to admire only, but the never truly belong to me. So just stay one side and admire the beauty behind and let it go after admiring, just like walking in the museum.

People like me, can only dream of having things that are beautiful, but never really have a hand of those things in reality. That's maybe one reason why I like to daydream where you can 'have' the things I want in my dreamland.

This two weeks is gonna be a hard time for me in studying...before the one week of recess week...

Jiayou! :)

The Incredibles~

2011-09-11T20:28:00.003+08:00

"我们走路有风，你们放屁才有风。我们什么都行，你们什么都不行。我们洗刷刷，洗刷刷，Wuwu~洗刷刷，洗刷刷, Incredibles~!!!"

Haha. That's our group cheer. Hahaz. Went for WSC FOC de orientation camp. I was inside this group called Incredibles. Yea..Jack-jack. Our group was so pathetic, only got 6 freshies in the beginning, the halfway three left, leaving three. And I was so surprised that I was the youngest inside my group. Wah~...cos I was always usually the few of the oldest in my clique.

We played many weird games like "the MRT game", the "catch mice" game, "concentration" game, the "frog" game...Hahaz...NICE~

Our GLs were cute and humorous. Had much fun yesterday playing though had done much working around Sentosa. Then after the amazing race in the afternoon, got some night trail along Imbiah Trail where I was like a blind walking through due to my night blindness. But lucky everyone was very kind and good to me in leading me through the dark and black trail. Was really fun the whole day yesterday. Yeah..... :)

Nw got to mug already. Tests and Quizzes are coming out this few weeks. OMG~!

Maybe this will be my FIRST TIME FAILING MATHS in my whole life.

DIE~

前世之谜~

2011-09-05T22:43:00.002+08:00

Have you wondered what are you in your past life?

Recently I read a chinese novel called 寻找前世之旅.

This book mainly focus on the point 前生之因，后世之果的宿命.

The things that is done by you or done to you will still follow you in your future life no matter how many times you are reborn. This made me wonder what my past life was like and also make me think after this life what's my next life gonna to be. Is death really frightening? Many of these questions usually pop out form my brain when I can't sleep. Being dead, where will you go to then? What happen to things and people that you are used to be? Suddenly, will have the fear of death, fear of leaving things and people you used to be with, the fear and unease to where you will be at after death...hell or heaven?

This book was quite an unique book for me cos really seldom these kind of books do exists which some may think is a fantasy book. But, the book also holds the truth of the world we are living now.

SuperJunior 3D Movie

2011-09-04T00:32:00.003+08:00

Went to Vivo for SuperJunior 3D movie. Was totally awesome.The visual was so good and the atmosphere was quite high. Some fans in the cinema were also very high. Wonderful!!!

Leeteuk showed his cuteness during the concert.

Heechul showed his 'beauty' in the show, and got the most screams from his fans cos he'd left for army.

Eunhyuk showed his charm with his dance steps and rapping skills.

Yesung showed his power in his singing.

ShinDong showed his chubby-ness and gag.

Siwon showed his good-looking and his wonderful and perfect abs.

Sungmin showed his cuteness.

Donghae showed his nice-looking and swift dance skills.

Ryeowook showed his passion in singing.

KYUHYUN showed his good skills in singing and his mischievous side.

EVERYTHING was so so so nice!!! :)

Typical Pisces~

2011-09-03T00:07:00.002+08:00

I just found that I'm really a typical Pisces.

I like to daydream, daydream a lot. Have very not-reality fantasy thoughts. Just like a typical.

Recently was watching this show, which they every session will bring you to explore yourself in different aspects such as in love etc, which i think is so true. Using tarot cards and horoscope to tell you you.

So cool~ Got to study tomorrow~ Sianz~

陌上云暮迟迟归~

2011-08-30T11:54:00.003+08:00

This is the title of a chinese book I recently read.

The story was so so so so nice.

And the title was also very nice.

"云暮寒 : 那些我所拥有过的曾经,你给的最美

陆韶迟 : 爱你就好象呼吸一样理所当然,可是我可以屏住呼吸,却不能停止爱你

安以陌 : 耶稣说信我者得永生。你问我这个世界还有没有奇迹，我说有，只要寻找，只要相信。

安以陌是名副其实的狗仔队，如果她再调查不出当红天后的神秘男朋友是谁，她就可以直接滚出报社了, 却发现，天后的神秘是她当年甩了的初恋情人! 她是该出卖前男友发布这条新闻，还是装成不知道躲得他远远的? 可惜，云暮寒显然没打算善罢甘休，他不会放过这个6年前将他伤害的女人。他不要她好过，6年前他就发誓，要让她付出代价!可是她身边，已经有了一个不好对付的男人——陆韶迟! 面对昔日恋人的咄咄相逼，以陌该不该说出当年分手的秘密?真相一步步被揭开，他们的感情又该去何从?

当埋藏在记忆里的疼痛被撕裂，又将引起怎样的风云巨变?欺骗、背叛、放弃、等待、救赎……青春是不可诉说的伤，而我们的初爱，轻于流年……"

The lead girl character is one who wanted to fulfil her dad's wish of being a reporter, someone who had a terrible past and also uncommon heart problem....

Zhiting, Szeyee...can go find this book to read. U all sure cry onE.

-------

Recently, I read a book on two characters, Girl A and Boy B. Girl A likes this Boy B while Boy B also likes that Girl A. Basically, is like both like each other but the other one doesn't know. Both were afraid that their confession to the other party will destroy the friendship between them, so they rather choose to keep as a secret. In the end of the book, the girl died died due to sickness and the boy was so guilty and sad that he didn't confess.

It made me ponder if this really happen in reality, will the both of them keep in silent?

Night Scene of Singapore~

2011-08-28T13:53:00.002+08:00

Now, then I realised that the night scene of Singapore is so nice. Jiang and I went out the whole night yesterday to the city area which was a WOW sight for us. Went to Iluma to collect jiang and ah min's goodie bag for their safra marathon. Then went to eat Frolick Yoghurt. Nice~

Then went to Marina Sq for dinner and then head down to our 'free' flyer trip. Was very cool but due to the rain droplets on the window, no nice photo was taken. Such a pity. Then we walked through the Helix Bridge to Marina Bay Sands de shopping center which was so so so big. And we missed the time for Gong Cha. Haiz. Then we walked to Marina Bay to go home.

Everything there was so nice. Jiang suggested next time there's no need to go bar or pub already. We can just buy our drink and sit along the seats there to watch the scenery and enjoy ourselves as well....Haha.

School-ing for three weeks already~

2011-08-24T01:22:00.002+08:00

I have started school for the third week this week already. Everything is still as usual.. Attending lectures in different LTs, having short tutorial sessions which I seriously don't think is very very very helpful. Maybe sometimes was helpful when the tutor is going through those questions which you don't know how to do.

Slowly getting used to the uni life. Everyday either you wait for the lectures or you attend lectures. Waiting is a torture. Got to wait for hours before the next lecture, such a waste of time around. Can't they like make the lectures closer to one another and not stretch so far apart.?

Damn! I'm stuck with the programming. Gosh! Input and Output of data inside the computer. Then during lab session, u can only hear people typing the keyboard sound and clicking of the mouse. Wah~

Third week of school and I'm starting to fret on what to wear the next day. That's when I seriously miss wearing uniform. No worries on the attire and overall look.

Haiz..I seems to have gain weight.!!!Going for MORE exercise already. Eat less meat and drink more water.!!!

ugly~

2011-08-21T22:35:00.003+08:00

Hahax. Changing my song to this which i think is so suitable for me, especially the chorus.

" I think I'm ugly

And nobody wants to love me

Just like her I wanna be pretty

I wanna be pretty

Don't lie to my face tellin'

me I'm pretty

I think I'm ugly

And nobody wants to love me

Just like her I wanna be pretty

I wanna be pretty

Don't lie to my face cuz I know

I'm ugly "

Farewell~

2011-08-21T00:30:00.001+08:00

Farewell SumYin!...

Have a fun day today!

2nd week of School~

2011-08-16T21:09:00.002+08:00

This is the second week of my school. Was still alright, but still cant get to make more friends. Haix. This week tutorials are starting. Went for the first tutorial. Wah~ tutorial class was boring and time pass very fast. Tutors leave us to discuss on the tutorial questions and then will explain on questions raised by us. Then no more questions, end of tutorial.

Tomorrow, I have to attend one tutorial class ALONE. One hour after XiaoQi's tutorial class. Got to wait for one more hour ALONE. Oh man~, really don't know the feeling of being left alone especially in university where u see most are in pair or in gang. So scared....

kyuhyun so sad~

2011-08-14T22:40:00.000+08:00

so sad...his condition nt good, still lose..

Wad's Love all about?

2011-08-14T22:18:00.002+08:00

I'm in an irony state of thinking now, I guess.

I'm so envy of people going around in pairs with their loved ones yet happy that I'm still not one of them yet. Just questions that made me ponder much every time I see couples. "How do they know that they're in love with the other one?" "How's loving someone really feels like?" "How do I know whether I'm in love with that her/him?".... And many more questions.

I found that reading too many Chinese love novels did not help at all. Instead,it makes me more confused. Stories always go like this unpopular girl get to know a very popular guy, cool and handsome but bad temper. Then they will always quarrel until they fell in love with one another. I seriously don't think these happen in reality.

Haiz.....Random posting sia~~~

Museum Day~

2011-08-12T23:45:00.002+08:00

Today went out with XQ after school today. Went to Bugis to bai bai first. Then went walk walk. After that, we went to Man Fish Market for lunch. Then went around walk walk window-shop.

Afterwhich, went to Asian Civilization Museum to see Bing Ma Yong. And had much fun inside. then went to eat ramen.

Fun today!

School has started~

2011-08-09T18:45:00.000+08:00

School has started on monday.

Monday is the worse day in the week. Waited for 5 hrs for the next lecture. Haiz.

Sad and Happy~

2011-08-04T21:52:00.003+08:00

Today was a sad and happy day.

Sad that our plan to cycle at ECP was unable to do due to the consistent raining in Singapore. Xiangqin was so disappointed not cycling today, but xiaoqi was so happy cos she didn't wan to cycle in the first place.

Happy that we played others games. Went arcade and got addicted in the games there especially the basketball game. Yeah, so happy that i can score quite high ( to me, i think the score is high alr) and siemin was addicted to jubeat already. Then we went playnation to play wii. We played stupid rabbit game, dancing and jamming. So fun. And I just found that my rhythm was really bad. Cant play the drums.

Yesterday went for NTU Freshmen Welcome Ceremony 2011. Was boring, talks talks and more talks attended. But I've gt the feeling that: "Wah~school's really starting"

My arms are all aching now.~

Good Bye July, Hello August~

2011-07-30T22:27:00.001+08:00

Yea. July is finishing~

August is coming~ This August is full of events: National Day And...

Start of School~~~~~~~~ T_T

things i missed~

2011-07-29T19:19:00.002+08:00

I miss so many things in my life, especially the most recent ones: kids.

I'm so missing my kids in the childcare that I worked. So, yesterday i went back to the center to visit the kids and helped out the teachers, since there was not enough teachers in the center. had much fun and laughter with all the kids.

Misses the K2 cuteness and their crazy funny comments and actions, like they will say: "Teacher Shiya, Jerrel says he misses you so much..." or "Teacher Shiya, Sean says wan marry you..."....Puhahahaha....

Misses the K1 naughtiness. Everyone has their own naughtiness. Misses my N1 And PG babies' innocence. Hahaz.

放了自己~

2011-07-26T11:18:00.002+08:00

This is the title on the first song of my blog. 放了自己~

"放了自己放了回忆

放了世界不过如此而已

多少庆幸多少风景

在放了之后才清晰

放了自己放了回忆

放了那配不上你的伤心

你该诠释的不再是悲剧主角的残影

而是新的自己"

I think it suits me the most.~

the story of mine~

2011-07-24T19:48:00.002+08:00

This is some story that I did not mention to anyone before. Something maybe is time for me to let go.

Since young, I was a quiet and not-very-nice-looking girl. Maybe a girl that seems to bullied very easily. My childhood can say to be not a very happy one. In school, I was the quiet one sitting alone playing and eating. I remembered that I was very not going well with the classmates. Then this incident struck me, which made me the class enemy. I became friend with a girl in the class, whom wasn't like by the rest of the class. In turn, the class hated me much and more unexpected was that the girl became friend with the rest of the class and hate me as well.

Maybe from that time onwards, I have this shadow in me that friends are not very trusting. Until primary school, I met some awesome friends that made me open my heart to friends again. Soon, I was a cheerful and out-going girl, having fun with my friends and teachers. Until secondary school, I was sooner faced with the same problem and met with the same incident.

Secondary school maybe was a torture for me, while others seem to enjoy that the most. Being alone from my primary school to the new area, I was back to the quiet girl. Beginning, i met with some and became good friends. But is not very ever-lasting. In the end, I was the one suffering. A friend of mine backstabbed me and caused many trouble for me. In the years in seconday, I remembered crying under my bedsheet daily. Until I took the results, I felt that I've gotten released.

This made me have the fear again. The fear of over-trusting my friends. The fear of friendship. It also made to know that I should not show my weakness to others. So, I became one that everyday looks cheerful and crazy but hidden everything to oneself. Hahax. Sometime, it is just so hard and tiring to do so daily, to act happy daily.

So, I have been that for 4 years. Long right?.Maybe. JC was quite enjoyful for me, but not all as well. Especially during Project Work and some other times not to be mention.

So, now after spilling everything out, maybe, hope that I can really let everything go.

NDP - NE SHOW 3

2011-07-23T23:22:00.002+08:00

Today went to watch NDP - NE show 3 with my mum. Was nice, especially the theme this.

Only think I hate was that the two bitches sitting in front of us. Standing on the seats instead and blocking our views. No brain arh?

i'm gonna play hard before sch starts!

2011-07-22T22:00:00.003+08:00

Yes!.I'm gonna play hard and enjoy myself before school starts. OMG! It's gonna be school time again. Half year had gone. Play time is all over. Gonna prepare myself for the school and this brand new life in brand new chapter.

Went to watch Harry Potter today with szeyee and ruiyang. The movie was not bad, but they didn;t follow the book somehow due to constriction of time and also the ending was like erm....

Then went around walk walk and window-shop. Then went to farrer Park city square there, same to walk walk and shop shop. Today was a fun day out.

fun holiday~

2011-07-19T20:20:00.003+08:00

Had fun today. Went out with my babes: ama, ati and st. Hahaz. Went clementiMall for seoul Garden where ati was later for 1.5hours. Haix. As usual for her to be late. Then we gave her her belated birthday present and she was totally shocked and touched. Hehe.

Then went around walk walk and went bowling at HomeTeamNS.

While walking there, we recalled our memories together with one another in our secondary school life: St john, the trainings, the camps, the public duties, the NDP we took part, the NCOs course and camp we been through and many more. We were laughing like crazy when we talked about all those. Wah~...time passes so fast....

'jobless' certified~

2011-07-17T22:13:00.002+08:00

Yea. I'm jobless now. Unemployed~

Friday was my last day at the center. Cried when giving out gifts to the teachers and my kids, especially my K2s. Wishing them all the best.

Saturday went out for last minute planning. Went to eat Watami and went to Bottle Tree Bar for a drink. Everything was planned last minute. Haix. But was enjoyable.

3 more days~

2011-07-12T20:35:00.002+08:00

Yea..three more days till the day I say good-bye to the kids, my precious (not all lahhs)! Can't help doing the countdown. It has became a habit of me to do countdown to every special day.

Time is passing as slower as compared to the usual, that's what I feel. Maybe god knows that I'll be leaving, that's why he makes time slow for me. Hahaz.

bored!

2011-07-08T22:59:00.002+08:00

i super super super duper bored from this moment onwards, maybe till sunday. Nothing to do at home, nowhere to go, nothing to buy ( is say cant buy anything anymore), no nice food to makan. Totally bored to death.~

ARGHhhhhh................................................................

One more week~

2011-07-07T20:51:00.001+08:00

Seriously, I'm gonna miss the kids in the center, except some not to be mentioned. I've been there for half of the year already and really used to playing and scolding them already. Haiz.

One more week~

things i understand~

2011-07-03T21:02:00.003+08:00

Reflecting on my past few years, I found that I learnt lots and gone through much as well.

Don't fight for things that aren't yours in the beginning.

Don't fight for everything that you think is yours. It will end up being 'wounded' ones. What is yours is yours, what is not is not. Fighting for those will end up hurting the others or yourself or both.

Don't over-rely or over-trust your friends.

Friendship is very fragile thing. It can be used to cherish, also can be used to betray. Over-reliance or over-trusting them may bring more harm and torture on yourself.

Never show your weakness to others.

Always have a mask to prevent people from spotting your weakness or unhappiness.

And many more....

So excited for weekends~

2011-07-01T19:57:00.004+08:00

Reasons to why I'm so excited about weekends:

1. To sleep as long as I can throughout.

2. To go out for buffet again this week.

3. To watch my now-favorite show〈醉后决定爱上你〉.

So happy today, reasons:

1. My darling is back.

2. 7 more working days to end of my job.

This is my darling~

goodbye june, hello july

2011-06-29T21:47:00.002+08:00

Yea, another 25.5 hours to July. Hahaz. Wah, half of the year is over! Time pass very fast, erm..is too fast. Soon, I'm gonna stop working and stay at home rest and rot like a pig. Then uni life starts for me.

The start of a brand new chapter and a brand new school life. Gonna to 'format' away all bad memories and experience to start anew. Hope I can really do so.

So tired after working these few days. Especially after bathing time. Too tired to do anything, but still got to do and then can rest.

Me, still crazy in love with the show <醉后决定爱上你 >

想，想，还在想~

2011-06-27T22:19:00.002+08:00

在想：

或许... 能力不足是失误，能力太强是错误。

有或许像《醉后決定爱上你》说的 ‘不要去追求不屬於你的東西，這樣比較快樂’。

常想太多的我，已经不知道什么是真实，什么是幻想的。

心事重重~

2011-06-23T21:46:00.002+08:00

今天的我心事重重~

在工作的时候，我发觉了一些事情。

做不足是罪，做过多也是罪的。

如果要在工作上维持良好关系，就不可以管太多，也不可以什么都不管。

做工难，做人跟难。

有时觉得自己做人做得很失败。

人常说‘ 女大十八变’，但我还是那个丑小鸭。

人常说 ‘只要努力，就可以看到成绩’，但不管我努力多久，还是达不到我期待的成绩。

也不管我努力多久，没有人可以看到我的努力，看到我的烦恼。

我要美好的爱情和友情，但两 ‘情’ 都没有。

shopping shopping shopping

2011-06-20T22:43:00.002+08:00

Went out shopping with szeyee.

Our trips start like that...

Pioneer JC to collect cert --> Orchard Cineleisure to eat sushi buffet and take neoprints--> Bugis Village to shop for clothes --> Iluma to buy Szeyee's hp pouch --> Bugis junction to walk and try clothes --> City Hall to have Starbucks coffee --> Suntec to exchange szeyee's addias jacket --> Marina Square to shop and buy things again.

Nice rite~

Happy Father's Day!

2011-06-19T22:19:00.003+08:00

Happy Father's Day to All daddies.!!

Haix. My dad isn't in Singapore today, so got to celebrate a day earlier.

Today went shopping with a 'live ATM', my mum, at causeway. Went uniquo and many other shops. Bought many things and also a bag worth $99. Hahaz. My mum was so heartbroken to buy tt bag for me, which I said was for uni. Hahaz. 赚到~

Tomorrow not going work, took leave to go out to eat and shop and relax myself.Hahaz.

*******

I think that was her I saw. We didn't even great or smile at one another, at least I didn't. But I think that is unavoidable to meet her in the same estate we are living. Wah, things had became like this.

i'm gonna crazy

2011-06-17T21:46:00.002+08:00

I don't know how to describe this week. It was a torture for me.

over-sensitive~

2011-06-14T20:01:00.002+08:00

The horoscope says that Pisces are usually over-sensitive, which I think is absolutely for my case. Got to admit sometimes I can be a bit over-sensitive. Thinking of things that aren't true and some even don't happen. But I just can't stop that. Haiz.

Now, is like a daily routine to scold the kids and also play with them during work. And helping out the teachers and busying the whole day if there isn't enough teachers. I wonder whether I'll miss the days now when school starts. There have been many memories there in the center, be it good or bad; memories that I will cherish.

I came by a phrase "最珍贵的东西常是无价的", which I agree partially. Many important things are usually priceless, but some are not.

how i wish i can go out

2011-06-13T22:24:00.002+08:00

Haiz.

How I wished I can go out more often.

Everyday going to work and staying at home; is a very bored thing to do daily.

Even weekends, I can't go out that often.

Wah, I sound so 宅...

Haiz.

surprises~

2011-06-09T21:38:00.002+08:00

Indeed, many surprises today.

First, one teacher will be on leave for two days. Today and tomorrow. Gonna to be a busy day for thurs and fri. Especially on friday where three teachers will not be at the center. Sure havoc tomorrow.

Second, got a surprise gift from one of the teachers. Was a whole set of Uni stationaries.

Third, I got cut by a sharp penknife when i was cutting cupboards.

Was quite a deep cut. Haiz.

Late updates~

2011-06-08T20:08:00.003+08:00

Sorry for the late updates~.

Was kinda busy this week.

Went out last weekend to celebrate XiaoQi's 21st birthday. Went Changi Airport to celebrate. Was kinda weird but also special. Hehe.

This week, many people are getting into their 19s. Happie Birthday to the June Babies.

Working

2011-06-04T17:40:00.000+08:00

Working as usual.

Life's still boring as always.

tiring but fun saturday~

2011-05-29T13:38:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was fun but also tiring. Morning went to help in the Mymca World Play Day with sm and xq. Helped in the balloon sculpting. We had much fun playing with the balloons. Hahaz. Then went popeyes for lunch and did our cards there. Then we head to Orchard Ion and Taka to buy presents for the June babies. Ion and Taka was so so so crowded, giving me headache. And Orchard is so so big and messy, walked a long route to find the shops. Haiz.

Then we went dhoby to meet up with RY and had dinner at Just Acia with free flow drinks and ice-cream. Then went Bugis to catch a movie. We checked many places but all either full or left with the first seats. In the end, we went Iluma to watch KungFu Panda 2 . The 9.40 show. Haiz. Reached home about 12 plus. Slept at 3. Haiz.

indecisive~

2011-05-26T23:13:00.002+08:00

To work or not to work for tomorrow. Thinking of this question for days. To work half-day instead or not to work at all. In the end, decided not to work and stay at home rest till my cough and flu is much much better. Also got to go PTM at my brother's school tomorrow.

Finally got everything settled and planned. These tiny winy things are giving me headache and unnecessary stress. Haiz. anticipating for saturday event at the singapore flyer there. Cool~

Stupid google chrome that don't allow me to login in and blog. Freak~

This whole week still coughing like mad and pulling tissues as though they are free. Haha.

2011-05-23T20:24:00.001+08:00

overseaz~

2011-05-22T21:13:00.003+08:00

Today went overseas with ama, st, ati and her bf. Was a very fun time. We played alot but shop little. That's sad. Then took alot of photos and had much fun. Gt a surprised belated birthday celebration from them as well. I'm so touched and thanks.

Yesterday went to work in the morning. Then went out to eat with my 'son' and sm at pizza hut.

Fun weekends~

Gonna to be sick~

2011-05-18T20:48:00.000+08:00

My throat is in pain. Sore throat...

Haiz...

Dun wan fall sick this week lehhss....

boring weekends

2011-05-15T22:32:00.002+08:00

Supposedly yesterday I'm working. Then the principal asked me worked on next saturday. So saturday was a boring day. Got to go dental, library and also exchange money for my playing next week.

Today worse. Spend my day doing housechores. Sianz.

Hoping next week can come faster~

fun day~

2011-05-11T21:02:00.003+08:00

Fun day today. Took leave and went out to celebrate xiangqin's belated 19th birthday. Went Aston to eat and then went mindcafe to play.

Fun day~...

Now, no mood to work tomorrow~

Work work work

2011-05-10T20:02:00.002+08:00

Work has been the center of my life recently. Morning wakes up, prepare myself for work. Took the LRT, squeezing with the ITE students daily. Drown myself in my music. Reach the childcare, punch my card, then start work. Handle the kids, sweeping and mopping the floor. Lunch time eating and rotting myself there. Then back to work, make milk for the kids. Then watch them having lessons and playing the toys. Then time's up, go home squeezing the LRT again. Reach home, bathe, dine, use com and sleep. And everything repeats again.

Suddenly, questions struck me. "Why work?". "Why work so hard and earning so little?"....

injuried~

2011-05-07T17:34:00.000+08:00

I'm injured by a kid in the childcare center.

Haish~

headache~

2011-05-03T22:49:00.001+08:00

Having headache over whether to choose NUS project and Facilities Management or NTU Mathematical science....

Haiz~

F~ time...

2011-05-03T22:30:00.002+08:00

Don't be mistaken..I mean Fun time, Family time and Friends time.

The past 'long' holiday I enjoyed myself a lot and had intense playing.

Saturday went to Sentosa coasta Resorts. It was my cousin who booked it. Had fun with my cousin and my family. Had BBQ. Went to the beach to play. Saw jellyfish in the sea. Gosh. Saw a crab and it almost died under my dad's hand. Then went to play the skyride and the luge. Was great fun. Should go and play that again...Came home on sunday.

Monday went USS with a cheaper price. Hehe. Had fun there.

unpredictable life

2011-04-25T20:42:00.003+08:00

Life is always full of surprises, unpredictables, choices to make, relationships and many other things that are out of one's control. Who can guess the next move or next thing that will happen on you. Maybe the guy in the movie limitless who ate the NTZ some pills that can made him look 50 steps ahead of others.

Sometimes I just hate these unpredictables and surprises, because they might not be a pleasant one which I called them 'the bomb'. Just like an activity planned long time ago was last minute cancelled or postponed. A promise became disappointment. Surprises became tragedies. Two best friends becoming two strangers or enemies. Hardships does not bring success. Anticipation becomes disappointment.

Have I regretted making my choices in life? Yes, I do. Many. Regretted many things. Maybe too many things. But we can never go back to that time where we made our choices again.

How I wished that I could go back in time, so that I would study harder. Going into another school. Getting a better life. How I wished that I had never met you and accept you as my friend. How I wished that I wasn't that foolish to be fooled and manipulated by you. How I wished that my life will be better. How I wished that I had studied harder and getting better grades in ALevels. How I wished that I wasn't that stupid to fall into your trap. How I wished...How I wished....

Now, anticipated to go to USS 2May, but also with a sianz mood looking forward for that day. Don't know what unexpected things will happen that day.

And anxious about the acceptance to uni. Acceptance letters are not here yet. I'm scared that I can't make into any university. And if I can't, I don't know what I'm going to do. End my life at nineteen?

Pain everywhere~

2011-04-23T21:09:00.002+08:00

Leg pain, knee pain. shoulder pain, head pain, heart pain~

I've no idea how to express my mood today. Everything I thought came true.

Let bygones be bygones. I got to tell myself this.

cos' u had a bad day~...

2011-04-23T09:18:00.001+08:00

Had my day started with an astonishing comment. Next came down with a big flu which I think the cause of it was the sleeveless shirt I wore when sleeping. Cant wear sleeveless when sleep, cos next day sure flu. Then slowly turn to fever.

Having a bad omen about today's activity~

原来我们在你心里是没有地位的~

2011-04-22T22:13:00.002+08:00

This is so ridiculous.!. Had never heard about anything like this before. I'm so speechless when you told me. Suddenly I just found that: friendships are so fragile, so invisible.

If you were to let me choose between the kids in the childcare and the people in society to be my friends, I choose the kids. Kids are more innocent and lovely. They will care about your feelings and care about you with a peck on your cheeks. They wont spill any secret of yours to anyone else. They wont do this that disappoint you.

And I just so tired now about everything~

NICE~

2011-04-22T22:07:00.002+08:00

NICE DAY TODAY~

irony~

2011-04-18T20:18:00.002+08:00

OMG..

my mum ask me to keep my hair, as in let it continue to grow long. In the first place she was the one that asked me to cut short. Now she want me to have long hair...

irony~

another wonderful saturday~

2011-04-17T22:24:00.003+08:00

Just enjoyed another wonderful weekends. Friday worked till door closed, sianz. Saturday got to work early and lucky that all the kids left the center before 1.30. Then head down to bugis to meet with the clique.

Fan nan-ing with what to eat at Bugis Junction and finally went to Chinatown to eat BBQ stuffs. Then head down for ice-kachang. Had fun that day. Then went pool at cine again. This is the third week in the row that we have been to cine already, three saturday in a row sia.

Then sunday stayed at home rot and went library as well.

Coming few weekends, I'm gonna have a wonderful time. 22 Good Friday, holiday. 23 going cycle. 30 going sentosa for chalet. Yeah~

Haiz..I must be crazy nowadays. Keep having weird dreams.

WW -- Why Work?

2011-04-14T21:13:00.003+08:00

Sometimes I wonder why did I in the first place wanted to work? For money? For time to spend faster? Sometimes I just don't know. Getting up early in the morning and squeezing in the small and crowded LRT in the morning and sometimes having hard time getting up the train. Reaching the childcare and wonder what new things will happen; which children will cry; which one will give you headache; which teacher is not here and have to OT...blah blah blah...

And sometimes the kids reminded me of my childhood. Heard from my parents that they had a hard time bringing me to school in K1 for the first two months. I cried and refused to step into the school, though I cant remember. What I can remember is that since young I'm a very quiet child, didn't want to talk much with people around. This caused me to have no or little friends. Some more, the kids in the school also don't really like me, I was always being 'abandon' and forgotten.

Going to primary school had made a change in my character. I started to become out-going and fun till secondary school. In my secondary life, I was made to realize many things and experience many things as well. And also doubted many things. Now, I hoped my uni life will be a peaceful one.

And also hoped to have someone that I can have a heart-to-heart talk with.

Pray hard~

Enjoyments and changes~

2011-04-13T22:05:00.002+08:00

Having much fun around these few weeks.

Going out eating delicious food-- sushi buffet (though many scared of the radioactive radiations in the japanese food).....

And also going out to play pool, bowling, went mindcafe as well. Finally I learnt a bit on how to play and grab that pool stick. Bowling was fun, me of getting into the longkang is decreasing. Getting more on hand in bowling. Yipps.

Changes: made slight changes in my blogskin. That icon saying " we are working...blah blah" is irritating me. It has been there almost 2 days.

can fairy tales really happen?

2011-04-08T20:40:00.002+08:00

Maybe due to my work that leads me to come in contact with more fairy tales with happy ending, but do all these happy ending become reality?

Recently, crazy in love in reading books that the female leads' soul traveled back in time into another body and had such crazy love relationships with damn cool or with the handsome emperor...Can these really happen?. If it does, I hope I'm the one; so that I can escape from reality now.

But I know that sure won't happen...

As I mentioned, an ugly duckling will always be one ugly duckling...And that nice guys will look at nice-looking girls...That's reality~

ugly duckling becoming swan..is that possible?

2011-04-06T19:17:00.002+08:00

Haha...fairy tales always say that an ugly duckling will eventually turn into a beautiful and attractive swan. And an ugly person will eventually turn into a beautiful person...

But all these are fairy tales right?...

Can these really happen in reality?~

burning hot weather~

2011-04-05T17:27:00.003+08:00

These few days' weather is so freaking warm. Burning hot. Especially in the afternoon. Even in the child care center, it is still burning warm. Can't stand the hotness.

Haiz. Recently I cant remember what my dreams were, but the unknown feeling is still there...But don't know what kind of feeling is that.

Zhiting..can watch these two links...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYelZRIZiI4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AhrrZTLdd1g&feature=related

weekends here again~

2011-04-02T21:57:00.002+08:00

Surly this weekends I'm gonna to enjoy myself this time.

Haiz...Few days ago..had this weird dream again. This time dreamt of changing house to a condo. The flooring is made of glass, the space was very big and classic, but also modern. My room was beautiful blue and the scenery seen from my room was totally perfect. My room had one big glass window, just one at the side, can see park, swimming pool and roads. Totally gorgeous.

So wanted to stay in the dream forever...

Today went town eat sushi buffet. Then went 'xue ping' with xiangqin. :)

believe or not?

2011-03-30T19:59:00.002+08:00

一见钟情...anyone believe that?

I don't believe in that, but yesterday my dream was on that. The feeling still can remember, but can't remember where and who and when. The feeling is sweet, maybe that's 恋爱...i dont know...

I must be crazy to have this kind of dream....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qe8nrktMBjs

rest-less weekends

2011-03-28T20:52:00.003+08:00

Having my rest-less weekend....the just passed weekend. Saturday had to work, sunday got to go mandai there pray. Both days woke up damn early in the morning. Haiz.

Back to my dream, on couples, in love and being loved. Sometimes, I wonder how one knows that you like that him/her, or love him/her?. How the feeling like?. How do you also know whether you really like/love that him/her or is just friends.?. So so so so envy of couples walking on the streets when I travel along myself...Haiz....

Today, many of the kids in my class didn't come today. Haiz.

Damn tudou website, don't allow me to watch videos in websites...Haiz.

unpaid day~

2011-03-25T19:48:00.002+08:00

Today not working cos the center is closed for teachers training. But we went to the place called SATA to have our medical checkup and for all test.

However, I am losing blood today, that's why I can take the lab test. Have to take the blood and urine test next time when I stop bleeding. Haiz. So unlucky~

Sleepless~~

2011-03-23T19:48:00.002+08:00

Having trouble sleeping yesterday. Can't sleep yesterday and waking up almost every hour. Haish.

Today both my body and my soul are very very tired......

Thanks to one child.....

Random~

2011-03-22T20:14:00.002+08:00

Recently had a weird nightmare. This is the description of my dream:

"爱我的人，不是我爱的。

我爱的却不爱我......... "

Many things happened today...Haiz...

Juz found out that I hate situation when I cant help someone when someone is in trouble....

To post or not to~

2011-03-19T22:17:00.003+08:00

Always having the trouble thinking whether to blog or not to blog....

Or wad to blog and what not to blog....

Today nothing much happening around me. Weekends are always boring but pass very very fast.

Went to the library and saw a kid from the child care and she recognised me. She came to me waving and calling me 老师....She was also one of the new kids in the center. So happy that she recognise me.

Weekends supposed to the days when I can go out playing, but now, staying at home facing my walls and also my laptop, surfing aimlessly around the web...Haiz...

My Working life~

2011-03-18T20:34:00.002+08:00

My working life is tiring but fun, full of anger but also full of laughter.

Tomorrow is one of my class's kid's birthday. She is a sweet and pretty girl and like sticking with me. Happie 3 years old birthday to you!!!!Love you :)

My working place is very weird...and very WTHell....

This week is very fast~

painful things are harder to forget

2011-03-14T22:15:00.002+08:00

Got to admit, in my 19 years of living, I experienced much, gone through lots and suffered terribly.

原本相信友情是多么的好，是多么的纯洁~

Yesterday sleepless night for me, but thought a lot of things. Found out that some things just cant be easily being forgotten. Though people always say " what has happened had happened, so just let it go." But some things you just cant put down, things that hurt me so badly and put me into embarrassment and awkwardness.

原本相信朋友是可以信任，可以依靠的~

Found out one ridiculous thing today, regarding my this year birthday present...Makes me don't to laugh about it or be sad about it. Maybe is coincidental~?

原本开朗的我，现在怎么会活得那么辛苦~?